So conversation last night, as well as checking out some pre-curser convo on Facebook has led me to blog today. Normally, I probably would roll my eyes and move on, but I also think it's important to share ones beliefs with others. Notice I said share.
The debate at hand was living together before getting married. A "friend" is getting married next year and the living arrangements between her and her soon-to-be are becoming strained. Currently they live seperately, but it looks as if that situation is about to change. But her dilema is that the pastor of the church where they are to be wed is basically swinging the gauntlet on the two living together before marriage.
While I can understand where the pastor is coming from and understand that many churches and/or religions frown upon such a practice, in today's society can we realistically expect couples to adhere to this practice?
For the record I'm Roman Catholic. But I'm far from the typical Catholic or even Christian. I don't go to church on a regular basis...at least not anymore. Why? Well, there are several reasons...mostly what I believe and feel that God would want out of me as a person versus what has been shoved down my throat growing up, but those are my personal thoughts.
I will share the whole "living together/pre-martial sex" thoughts though.
Today's society (mentally and physically) is far from what it was back when reglion ruled the land. Notice I said religion...and there's reason for that. While there is supposed to be seperation of Church and State, one can't help but to remember how America came to be. Our first foriegn settlers escaped their country because their religious beliefs clashed with the beleifs of those in power. So they found a "new land" and practiced their religion here, set their laws to such religion and judged one another that way as well.
99% of religions are agains pre-martial sex, living with member of the opposite sex who is not family and the like. This bothers me. Who defines when someone is married? The church where the ceremony or ritual takes place? Or the state who authorizes the change in name and tax statuses? What about the free will to live with whoever the hell you choose? Who gets to decided that for you if you can't? Is that still considered free will?
I believe that back at the beginning of time the notion that living together and/or sleeping together before "marriage" was considered a "sin" was formed. Why? Well, read this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bride_price
"Bride Price" was considered the worth of a bride. This worth diminished if said bride had a child fathered by another man, did not live with her parents or was considered 'used goods'.
And there you have it.
This practice of bride pricing is still going on in many cultures today. Sad really.
While I think the ceremony of marriage is a beautiful thing and shows that you are two souls who pledge to serve your God to the best of your ability as one in said "marriage", I do believe the whole instution of "marriage" is a state run gimic, for lack of better word. The church doesn't change your name, doesn't change your tax status...and therefore shouldn't really care who you live/sleep with.
I don't know. Because I also believe that the state shouldn't have any say should you wish to "marry" somoene of the same sex. Who cares!
And this is why I wish to make my own religion. Don't get me wrong, I do follow my faith to a certain extent...but then I feel it's worthwhile to explore what you have learned and stretch it to fit what you feel in your heart. I don't believe God/Allah/Higher Power would want us to live where we constantly persecute those who we believe are not following "the Law", because there is no definition of whose "Law" it is...it may be your law, but it's not mine.
Okay, that's it...I'm going to stop now before I dig myself deeper.
Friday, December 5, 2008
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
At the rate we're going....who knows!
Hey everyone! It's lovely ol' me again. With more randomness.....
So the past week, I've been psuedo-living in my sister & brother-in-laws place while they enjoyed the beautiful Florida weather and Disney magic (note loads of sarcasm -- I'm totally jealous). And while there, I came to this realization:
That apartment is haunted! LOL. No seriously. My friends can attest that things like ghosts and the dark and monsters don't scare me. Granted I'm almost 29, but they never did. I remember watching all the Poltergiest movies with my dad when I was 5 and laughing. And it's not like being in a strange place gives me the heebeejeebees. I've slept in the middle of the woods in a two man tent and not been scared.
So what happened? Well...here's the story: I was just dozing off in the bed with both doors closed (they have a door that leads to the living room and one that goes into the bathroom (which also has a door to the hallway). All of a sudden, I thought I heard one of the doors creek open. (For those of you not familiar with the apartment, a little background. The house is a raised ranch style building that was converted into four apartments. Three are 2 bedroom and then Rich & Amanda's is a one-bedroom above the three car garage. Their entrance is seperate from everyone else's) I had my back to the door to the living room, so I lazily looked over my shoulder and ensured that the door was still closed. It was, so I resumed my dozing. Shortly thereafter, I thought I heard what sounded like someone walking around in the living room area. I kind of pushed that thought aside since that's also where the rabbits' cages are located. I figured they were a little restless and just moving about. I dozed off again, yet still semi-consious. That's when I swear somene put their hands on the bed and began to shake the bed up and down -- kinda like when a kid jumps on the bed.
I'm dead serious people. The bed was shaking. I immedately shot up in bed and looked around. Both doors were still closed and there was no one in the room with me...and no other sounds. Not even the rabbits were moving about. Totally freaked beyond belief, I pulled the covers up around me and began to pray. As I started mumbling my Our Fathers and Hail Marys, goosebumps were forming on my arms and legs and the hair on my neck was standing at full attention. I literally was contemplating throwing my shit in my car and heading home to let the rabbits fend for themselves.
I have NEVER been so scared in my life. Even now, just talking about it gives me the creeps. Yeesh.
Oh well, until my next fun adventure! :)
So the past week, I've been psuedo-living in my sister & brother-in-laws place while they enjoyed the beautiful Florida weather and Disney magic (note loads of sarcasm -- I'm totally jealous). And while there, I came to this realization:
That apartment is haunted! LOL. No seriously. My friends can attest that things like ghosts and the dark and monsters don't scare me. Granted I'm almost 29, but they never did. I remember watching all the Poltergiest movies with my dad when I was 5 and laughing. And it's not like being in a strange place gives me the heebeejeebees. I've slept in the middle of the woods in a two man tent and not been scared.
So what happened? Well...here's the story: I was just dozing off in the bed with both doors closed (they have a door that leads to the living room and one that goes into the bathroom (which also has a door to the hallway). All of a sudden, I thought I heard one of the doors creek open. (For those of you not familiar with the apartment, a little background. The house is a raised ranch style building that was converted into four apartments. Three are 2 bedroom and then Rich & Amanda's is a one-bedroom above the three car garage. Their entrance is seperate from everyone else's) I had my back to the door to the living room, so I lazily looked over my shoulder and ensured that the door was still closed. It was, so I resumed my dozing. Shortly thereafter, I thought I heard what sounded like someone walking around in the living room area. I kind of pushed that thought aside since that's also where the rabbits' cages are located. I figured they were a little restless and just moving about. I dozed off again, yet still semi-consious. That's when I swear somene put their hands on the bed and began to shake the bed up and down -- kinda like when a kid jumps on the bed.
I'm dead serious people. The bed was shaking. I immedately shot up in bed and looked around. Both doors were still closed and there was no one in the room with me...and no other sounds. Not even the rabbits were moving about. Totally freaked beyond belief, I pulled the covers up around me and began to pray. As I started mumbling my Our Fathers and Hail Marys, goosebumps were forming on my arms and legs and the hair on my neck was standing at full attention. I literally was contemplating throwing my shit in my car and heading home to let the rabbits fend for themselves.
I have NEVER been so scared in my life. Even now, just talking about it gives me the creeps. Yeesh.
Oh well, until my next fun adventure! :)
Friday, November 14, 2008
How I lost the weight and kept it off!
Another great blog from me! :) I know you're too excited.
After the whole fiasco with my bridesmaid dress for my sister and getting remeasured and refitted at least 5 times, I was leary to set foot on a scale again.
Granted I was ecstatic that I had lost like 45 lbs since March, but I was more afraid that I had gained any of that weight back...because I was happy with the new me.
Yesterday though, I sucked it up and stepped on the scale at my mom & dad's. And my jaw hit the floor.
I lost more weight. I'm down 50 lbs altogether.
So what did I do? Well...nothing. No really. Here's what went down over the past few months:
1. I got another job, a retail job. It requires me to be on my feet, moving and lifting things. I'm active for Christ sakes! This is great, because I hate normal exercise.
2. Since getting that job, I've stopped snacking for the most part. I mean, I'm not sitting at home gorging myself on chips, cookies, pudding and what not while I lay across my bed surfing the internet.
3. I think because of all this recent activity, my metabolism has changed drastically. I eat like there's no tomorrow when it is time to eat. Granted, not as much as I would have stuffed into my face prior to March, but still plenty. Yet, I haven't gained much, if any additional weight. Plus, it's not always the healthiest of foods....
4. I've had awesome support from friends and family! :) They rock, period.
So now, I'm 5 lbs away from reaching my goal I had set back in March and I'm truly excited. I haven't set any goals for the next year -- mostly because I want to acheive the one I have first, and I know it may not be as much as I lost this year...but here's hoping! :)
After the whole fiasco with my bridesmaid dress for my sister and getting remeasured and refitted at least 5 times, I was leary to set foot on a scale again.
Granted I was ecstatic that I had lost like 45 lbs since March, but I was more afraid that I had gained any of that weight back...because I was happy with the new me.
Yesterday though, I sucked it up and stepped on the scale at my mom & dad's. And my jaw hit the floor.
I lost more weight. I'm down 50 lbs altogether.
So what did I do? Well...nothing. No really. Here's what went down over the past few months:
1. I got another job, a retail job. It requires me to be on my feet, moving and lifting things. I'm active for Christ sakes! This is great, because I hate normal exercise.
2. Since getting that job, I've stopped snacking for the most part. I mean, I'm not sitting at home gorging myself on chips, cookies, pudding and what not while I lay across my bed surfing the internet.
3. I think because of all this recent activity, my metabolism has changed drastically. I eat like there's no tomorrow when it is time to eat. Granted, not as much as I would have stuffed into my face prior to March, but still plenty. Yet, I haven't gained much, if any additional weight. Plus, it's not always the healthiest of foods....
4. I've had awesome support from friends and family! :) They rock, period.
So now, I'm 5 lbs away from reaching my goal I had set back in March and I'm truly excited. I haven't set any goals for the next year -- mostly because I want to acheive the one I have first, and I know it may not be as much as I lost this year...but here's hoping! :)
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Some of my first thoughts...
If you've ever had the opportunity to hang out with me, even for a few moments you know that I have a tendency to say things out loud that normal people are just thinking. I admit, my mouth moves a lot faster than my brain on many an occasion. Usually, these moments are my funniest.
I have these unwritten rules and guides that I unleash, usually only in the company of close friends, that I call "The Fat Girls' Guide to Style, Socializing and Life in General".
Long ago, I was told in a speech class that you cannot ridicule one particular group of people for your comedic speech unless you were in fact one among that group.
Ladies and gentlemen, I am a Fat Girl. It's a fact. There is no getting around it, no "I'm not fat, I'm big boned" (well, I'm that too....but still). So I shall unleash my fat girl fury and let you in on a few of my guidelines....
1. Fat girls NEVER should dance on a bar...no matter their intoxication levels or the pleading of friends. Look, here's the reality; it looks like it's a blast. Seriously, if I wasn't so freaking afraid of heights and well, fat, I'd probably totally revel in the moment. But when fat girls get on bars, people start starring...and their not looking at you because you look amazingly hot up there sweating like a whore in church, whipping your damp hair around like you are the star in Flashdance the Revival. No, their staring because they're waiting for either A) the bar to break from the weight B) a humiliating clothes malfunction C) you to bump one of the other girls off the bar with your earthquake moves or D) YOU to fall off the bar. Let me tell you, when D happens, NO one is going to catch you. No one. You will fall straight to the floor. No guy is going to catch you, fall madly in love with you and then sit there while you tell your kids the story of how you met.
2. Mesh, netting and see-through clothing is NEVER an option for a fat girl. NEVER. You are going to look like the whale that got caught in the tuna net. It reminds me of those disgusting goo toys where you squeeze this innocent looking ball with a netting around it and a different color ooze starts to stick through the holes. Seriously, it makes me want to vomit. Leave the mesh and such to someone who can pull it off way better than you probably ever will -- your gay cousin.
3. Remember, at times, YOU ARE THE FAT FRIEND. Here's the deal....when given the choice of who they want to show off -- guys will always pick the girl that looks like she's the slut/stripper/naughty babysitter...whatever. They're not going for the "looks like she could pack away the entire buffet" girl. There is no reason to get upset. Sure there are guys that might actually go for that....but chances are few and far between -- oh, and if you find one, send him my way.
4 (and my final guideline for today). You are not ALWAYS the fat girl. Yes, you read that right. Understand that as a fat girl, you can't be completely down on yourself. You have to have some confidence and know that at times, you look amazing and people are looking at you for the right reasons. Just know that you are not always the fat one. And revel in that moment.
Now, some people may read this and think "Geez, she's brutal. That's just wrong." or that maybe I have low self-esteem. Let me tell you this...I'm just someone who knows exactly what I'm dealing with. I know that I'm big and it's something I'm diligently working on (I've lost 45 lbs since March), but I also take amazing care of me...I eat right (for the most part...I can't pass up good food!), bathe more than regularly and most importantly don't wear mesh. I'm confident in myself and my abilities and know what I want. That's me.
I have these unwritten rules and guides that I unleash, usually only in the company of close friends, that I call "The Fat Girls' Guide to Style, Socializing and Life in General".
Long ago, I was told in a speech class that you cannot ridicule one particular group of people for your comedic speech unless you were in fact one among that group.
Ladies and gentlemen, I am a Fat Girl. It's a fact. There is no getting around it, no "I'm not fat, I'm big boned" (well, I'm that too....but still). So I shall unleash my fat girl fury and let you in on a few of my guidelines....
1. Fat girls NEVER should dance on a bar...no matter their intoxication levels or the pleading of friends. Look, here's the reality; it looks like it's a blast. Seriously, if I wasn't so freaking afraid of heights and well, fat, I'd probably totally revel in the moment. But when fat girls get on bars, people start starring...and their not looking at you because you look amazingly hot up there sweating like a whore in church, whipping your damp hair around like you are the star in Flashdance the Revival. No, their staring because they're waiting for either A) the bar to break from the weight B) a humiliating clothes malfunction C) you to bump one of the other girls off the bar with your earthquake moves or D) YOU to fall off the bar. Let me tell you, when D happens, NO one is going to catch you. No one. You will fall straight to the floor. No guy is going to catch you, fall madly in love with you and then sit there while you tell your kids the story of how you met.
2. Mesh, netting and see-through clothing is NEVER an option for a fat girl. NEVER. You are going to look like the whale that got caught in the tuna net. It reminds me of those disgusting goo toys where you squeeze this innocent looking ball with a netting around it and a different color ooze starts to stick through the holes. Seriously, it makes me want to vomit. Leave the mesh and such to someone who can pull it off way better than you probably ever will -- your gay cousin.
3. Remember, at times, YOU ARE THE FAT FRIEND. Here's the deal....when given the choice of who they want to show off -- guys will always pick the girl that looks like she's the slut/stripper/naughty babysitter...whatever. They're not going for the "looks like she could pack away the entire buffet" girl. There is no reason to get upset. Sure there are guys that might actually go for that....but chances are few and far between -- oh, and if you find one, send him my way.
4 (and my final guideline for today). You are not ALWAYS the fat girl. Yes, you read that right. Understand that as a fat girl, you can't be completely down on yourself. You have to have some confidence and know that at times, you look amazing and people are looking at you for the right reasons. Just know that you are not always the fat one. And revel in that moment.
Now, some people may read this and think "Geez, she's brutal. That's just wrong." or that maybe I have low self-esteem. Let me tell you this...I'm just someone who knows exactly what I'm dealing with. I know that I'm big and it's something I'm diligently working on (I've lost 45 lbs since March), but I also take amazing care of me...I eat right (for the most part...I can't pass up good food!), bathe more than regularly and most importantly don't wear mesh. I'm confident in myself and my abilities and know what I want. That's me.
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